Heat Rays For Days

Perhaps you’ve noticed that the great ball of fire in the sky has taken a hike. Moved onto greener pastures. Said “see you never” to us Toronto-folk. I’ve certainly sensed that my morning bike ride down to the brewery is a little more fun, and by ‘fun’ I of course mean the opposite of fun, but today I’m using sarcasm as a coping mechanism. 

Here’s the thing though, and I’m gonna give it to you straight — our patio is still toasty and comfortable, thanks to some futuristic NASA level technology we’ve managed to harness. And let’s be honest, our motto in at the brewery has always been, “If it’s good enough for outer space, it’s good enough for Bellwoods”. 

So what the hell am I talking about? Infrared heaters that emit safe, clean wavelengths of light that are only absorbed by solid objects, transferring heat directly to a person, table or floor rather than heating the air. How do I know this? Because I copied and pasted it from the manufacturer’s website. 

But wait, you exclaim, what does all this mean in plain English?! Well my friends, it means that gone are the days when patio heaters could singe your eyebrows off and heat your pints of beer to a piping hot 462˚C (the temperature of Venus’ atmosphere) while the person next to you freezes, sitting just out of range of that familiar fiery embrace. Simply put, our heaters are fun-loving, peace supporting, egalitarians. 

Although we don’t have an infinity pool like the picture above (again, that’s something I stole from the Infratech website) we do have a comfortable patio even in these chilly months, so your penchant for outdoor drinking need not hibernate. Expect this cozy amenity from now on, or until the death grip of global warming eventually sinks its razor sharp teeth into our collective being.

So we’ll see you soon then?!